I Was the ‘Penis and Vagina’ Kid from Kindergarten Cop: A Candid Conversation.

Arnold Schwarzenegger is rightfully celebrated as an action movie legend. But, during the peak of his blockbuster fame in the eighties and nineties, he also headlined several critically acclaimed comedies. A prime example is Kindergarten Cop, which marks its 35th anniversary this holiday season.

The Role and That Line

In the 1990 movie, Schwarzenegger plays a undercover cop who masquerades as a elementary educator to track down a criminal. Throughout the movie, the procedural element serves as a loose framework for the star to film humorous moments with his young class. Without a doubt the standout involves a child named Joseph, who spontaneously stands up and states the stoic star, “It's boys who have a penis, females have a vagina.” Arnold deadpans, “Thanks for the tip.”

That iconic child was brought to life by child star Miko Hughes. In addition to this part encompassed a recurring role on Full House playing the antagonist to the famous sisters and the pivotal role of the child who returns in the film version of Stephen King’s Pet Sematary. He continues to act today, with multiple films on the horizon. Furthermore, he is a regular on the con circuit. Recently shared his recollections from the production over three decades on.

Behind the Scenes

Question: Starting off, how old were you when you filmed Kindergarten Cop?

Miko Hughes: I think I was four. I was the smallest of all the kids on set.

That's impressive, I have no memory from being four. Do you retain any flashes from that time?

Yeah, somewhat. They're snapshots. They're like picture memories.

Do you recall how you landed the job in Kindergarten Cop?

My parents, primarily my mom would take me to auditions. Frequently it was like a cattle call. There'd be 20, 30 kids and we'd all patiently queue, enter the casting office, be in there for a very short time, do whatever little line they wanted and that was it. My parents would help me learn the words and then, once I learned to read, that was probably the first stuff I was reading.

Do you have an impression of meeting Arnold? What was your take on him?

He was incredibly nice. He was playful. He was nice, which I guess makes sense. It'd be weird if he was a dick to all the kids in the classroom, that surely wouldn't foster a good work environment. He was fun to be around.

“It would be strange if he was mean to all the kids in the classroom.”

I understood he was a big action star because I was told, but I had not actually watched his movies. I knew the air around him — it was exciting — but he didn't frighten me. He was just fun and I only wanted to hang out with him when he had time. He was working hard, but he'd occasionally joke around here and there, and we would dangle from his limbs. He'd tense up and we'd be holding on. He was exceptionally kind. He purchased for each child in the classroom a yellow cassette player, which at the time was the hottest tech. That was the hottest tech out there, that funky old yellow cassette player. I played the Power Rangers soundtrack and the Ninja Turtles soundtrack for a long time on that thing. It eventually broke. I also was given a genuine metal whistle. He had the teacher's whistle, and the kids all were gifted copies as well.

Do you remember your time filming as being positive?

You know, it's funny, that movie is such a landmark. It was a huge film, and it was such an amazing experience, and you would think, as an adult, I would want my memories to be of collaborating with Schwarzenegger, the direction of Ivan Reitman, traveling to Oregon, seeing the set, but my memories are of being a selective diner at lunch. For instance, they got everyone pizza, but I wasn't a pizza fan. All I would eat was the meat from the top. Then, the original Game Boy was just released. That was the coolest toy, and I was quite skilled. I was the smallest kid and some of the other children would ask for my help to beat difficult stages on games because I could do it, and I was quite pleased with myself. So, it's all childhood recollections.

The Line

OK, that specific dialogue, do you remember the context? Did you know what you were saying?

At the time, I likely didn't understand what the word provocative meant, but I understood it was edgy and it caused the crew to chuckle. I understood it was kind of something I wasn't supposed to do, but I was given approval in this case because it was funny.

“It was a difficult decision for her.”

How it came about, from what I understand, was they hadn't finalized all the dialogue. A few scenes were written into the script, but once they had the whole cast on the set, it was more of a collaboration, but they refined it on set and, reportedly the filmmakers came to my mom and said, "There's a concept. We want Miko to have this line. Are you okay with this?" My mom didn't answer immediately. She said, "Give me a moment, I need time" and took a day or two. She deliberated carefully. She said she wasn't sure, but she believed it would likely become one of the most memorable lines from the movie and she was right.